Wish Fulfilled

God created a mule, and told him, 'You will be a mule, work constantly from dawn to dusk, and carry heavy loads on your back You will eat grass and lack intelligenceYou willlive for 50 years.'

The mule answered, 'To live like that for 50 years will be too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 20 years. And it was so.

Then God created a dog, and told him, 'You will hold vigilance over the dwellingsof man, to whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat his table scraps and live for 25 years.'

The dog responded, 'Lord, to live 25 years as a dog like that will be too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than10 years.' And it was so.

God then created a monkey, and told him, 'You will be a monkey. You will swing from tree to tree and act like an idiot. You will be funny, and you will live for 20 years.

The monkey responded, 'Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world will be too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 10 years.' And it was so.

Finally, God created man and told him, 'You will be the only rational being that walks on the earth You will use your intelligence to have mastery over other creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and live for 20 years.'

The man responded, 'Lord, to be a man for only 20 years will be too little. Please, Lord, give me the 30 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the 10 years the monkey refused.' And it was so.

Ever since the grant of that wish man's life goes somewhat like this:

He lives the first 20 years as a man enjoying himself without a worry in the world, then he marries and have children, to support them he has to work like a mule and carry the heavy responsibility (load) of his family on his shoulders.

This goes on till he is 40.

The next 15 years he lives a dog's life guarding his house and eating leftovers after the children have emptied the pantry.

Finally in his old age he lives the last 10 years as a monkey, entertaining his grandchildren by acting like an idiot. And so, it has been ever since.

Read more: Wish Fulfilled

Hard to Please

When Balwant Kaur disapproved the girl her son wanted to marry, a friend told the young man, 'You must find a girl who is like your mother.'

Several months later, the young man told his friend, I finally found a girl who looks, talks, and acts just like my mother.'

'Congratulations!' said his friend. 'Not yet', said the young man and added, 'this time my father objected'.

Read more: Hard to Please

Speaker vs MP

Two dogs were discussing their masters. The first said, 'My master is the speaker of the House, when I start barking, he cannot stand it and keeps saying, "please, please, please ..." to stop me from barking.'

The other, belonging to an MP, said, 'At least your master is polite. Mine is a most devious man.

After abusing everyone in the house he has the audacity to put a signboard on his gate, "Beware of the dog"

Read more: Speaker vs MP

Alive or Dead

Banta and Ram Lai were working on a roof, when Banta slipped and fell to the ground.

Ram Lai leaned over and called out: 'You dead or alive, Banta?' 'Alive,' moaned Banta.

'You're a liar. I don't know whether to believe you or not,' said Ram Lai.

'Then I must be dead,' said Banta, 'because you wouldn't dare call me a liar if I were alive.

Read more: Alive or Dead

Oh God

A disciple went to his Guru asking for tips to attain enlightenment. The Guru advised, 'Take a mala (rosary) and go up into the Himalayas and meditate.' The disciple went away.

Several months later, the Guru paid him a visit and asked, 'How do you like it up here in the snows?'

'Just fine,' replied the disciple.

'And what about the weather? Don't you freeze?'

'As long as I have my mala and my chillum (bowl full of tobacco), I don't care how cold it is.' T am glad to hear it. Can I also have achillum for myself right now,' asked the Guru, shivering with cold.

'Why not!' said the disciple. 'Mala! Would you bring us two chillums?

Read more: Oh God

Pandit Hari Chand

Once Josh Maliahabadi, Firaq Gorakhpuri and other poets were drinking at a bar. Pandit Hari Chand Akhtar who was a teetotaller picked up the wine-list and
began to scan its contents. josh asked him what he was reading.

"lt is a list of spirits, wines and beers and their prices," replied Akhtar.

Josh, the ever-ready wit remarked: "Pandiyi aisey lagtey hai jaisay kee hijda Kok Shastara par raha hai-Panditji it like a
eunuch reading a manual on sex." 

More Khushwant Singh Jokes
Indian Jokes
Bollywood Jokes